Thursday, October 08, 2009

Bible Correction

What if the Bible had happened to be written this way. . .

From Genesis

In the beginning God built a wondrous framework whereby more complicated creatures could naturally emerge from less complicated ones. Yea did he arrange it so that that which did not work so well did not make so many progeny and verily did the best of best go forth and multiply to the immense joy of God. It worked! What joy when after eons and eons his thoughtful and reasonable children emerged from the ooze and gave praise to him.

From Job
It also came to pass that Job asked God, "why Lord do I stick so mysteriously to thy earth"? And God said, "Lo, I say unto you, I have made the earth sticky whereby all the plants and animals may understand which way is up".

Now, a few thousand years after the bible first came out would it be heresy to teach Newton's law of gravitation? Or Einstein's expansion of that theory? Would the devout accept evolution because it was outlined in the bible AND verified by experiment and the preponderance of the evidence and decry evil gravity as the work of the devil even though it could stand the test of experimentation but defied the teachings of the Bible?

hmmm...I wonder? Of course the devote will miss my point entirely and just say, 'Well, it wasn't written that way so end of story'. But, since the Bible was written by people who didn't know shit from Shine-0-La it actually COULD have been written any way at all! Now we have idiots in Iowa and elsewhere who want 'creation science' (I just threw up in my mouth a little) ruining our educational system and pretty much making America the laughing stock of the rest of the educated world.

One more thing...How about a creation scientist asking the nobel committee if he has any chance of winning a nobel prize in Biology?

'Nuff said!

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